A Story to live by
There was a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind. She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always
there for her. She told her boyfriend, 'If I could only see
the world, I will marry you.'
One day,
someone donated a pair of eyes to her. When the bandages
came off, she was able to see everything, including her
boyfriend.
He asked her, 'Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?' The
girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind. The
sight of his closed eyelids shocked her. She hadn't expected
that. The thought of looking at them the rest of her life
led her to refuse to marry him.
Her boyfriend left in tears and days later wrote a note to her
saying: 'Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for before
they were yours, they were mine.'
This is how the human brain often works when our status changes.
Only a very few remember what life was like before, and who
was always by their side in the most painful situations.
Life Is a
Gift
Today
before you say an unkind word - Think of someone who can't speak.
Before
you complain about the taste of your food - Think of someone
who has nothing to eat.
Before
you complain about your husband or wife - Think of someone
who's crying out to GOD for a companion.
Today
before you complain about life - Think of someone who died
too early on this earth.
Before
you complain about your children - Think of someone who
desires children but they're barren.
Before
you argue about your dirty house someone didn't clean or
sweep - Think of the people who are living in the streets.
Before
whining about the distance you drive Think of someone who
walks the same distance with their feet.
And when
you are tired and complain about your job - Think of the
unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your
job.
But
before you think of pointing the finger or condemning
another - Remember that not one of us is without sin.
And when
depressing thoughts seem to get you down - Put a smile on
your face and think: you're alive and still
around.
==========================
I PRAY
THIS MOVES AROUND
THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
who is the most clever???? guy or girl....
A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes." The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes.
Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten!" The woman said, "That's okay." For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to".The woman replied,
"That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me." So, KAZAM-she's the most beautiful Woman in the world! For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you. " The woman said, "That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine." So, KAZAM-she's the richest woman in the world! The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like a mild heart attack."
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them.
Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good.
Male readers: Please scroll down.
The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife!!!
Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart.
Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show
PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!
Forward this to all the guys for a good laugh, and to all the ladies who have a good sense of humour.
Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten!" The woman said, "That's okay." For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to".The woman replied,
"That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me." So, KAZAM-she's the most beautiful Woman in the world! For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you. " The woman said, "That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine." So, KAZAM-she's the richest woman in the world! The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like a mild heart attack."
Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them.
Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good.
Male readers: Please scroll down.
The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife!!!
Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart.
Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show
PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen!!!
Forward this to all the guys for a good laugh, and to all the ladies who have a good sense of humour.
Monday, April 5, 2010
3 brothers
Banta Singh walks into a bar in London , orders 3 glasses of beer and sits in the backyard of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn.
When he finishes, he comes back to the bar counter and orders 3 more. The bartender asks him, "You know, beer goes flat after I fill it in the glass; it would taste better if you buy one at a time."
Banta Singh replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Dubai , the other in Canada and I'm here in London . When they left home, we promised that we'll drink this way to remember the days when we drank together."
The bartender admits this is a nice custom and leaves it there.
Banta Singh became a regular in the bar and would always drink the same way. He'd order 3 Beers and drink them in turn.
One day, he came in and ordered only 2 Beers. All the other regulars notice and fall silent.
When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bar tender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my sincere condolences on your great loss."
Banta Singh looked confused for a moment, and then he laughs.... "Oh, no,"
He said, "Everyone's fine; both my brothers are alive. The only thing is . .
I have quit drinking"!!!
** This particular joke won an award for the best joke in a competition held in Britain
When he finishes, he comes back to the bar counter and orders 3 more. The bartender asks him, "You know, beer goes flat after I fill it in the glass; it would taste better if you buy one at a time."
Banta Singh replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Dubai , the other in Canada and I'm here in London . When they left home, we promised that we'll drink this way to remember the days when we drank together."
The bartender admits this is a nice custom and leaves it there.
Banta Singh became a regular in the bar and would always drink the same way. He'd order 3 Beers and drink them in turn.
One day, he came in and ordered only 2 Beers. All the other regulars notice and fall silent.
When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bar tender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my sincere condolences on your great loss."
Banta Singh looked confused for a moment, and then he laughs.... "Oh, no,"
He said, "Everyone's fine; both my brothers are alive. The only thing is . .
I have quit drinking"!!!
** This particular joke won an award for the best joke in a competition held in Britain
clever indian with stupid australian
An Indian goes to Australia and goes to Woolworths (a grocery store in
Australia). He finds cat food at special prices. He picks a dozen cans
of cat food and goes to check out.
The Manager gets suspicious. He thinks that this guy cannot have a cat
and will probably feed cat food to his kids. He asks the Indian to show
him his cat before he could let him have cat food. The Indian goes home
and returns with a cat and gets to buy the cat food.
Next week the Indian finds dog food at special prices. He picks a dozen
cans of dog food and goes to check out. The Manager again gets
suspicious. He thinks that this guy has a cat but he cannot have a dog
and he will probably feed dog-food to his kids. He asks the Indian to
bring and show him the dog before he can let him have dog food.
The Sardar goes home and returns with a dog. He gets to buy the dog
food.
Next week the Indian comes to Woolworths with a bag. He asks the manager
to put his hand in the bag.
The Manager puts his hand in the bag, feels some thing slimy and
immediately takes it out. He shouts at the Indian, What the F*** is
this? Is this shit you idiot?
The Indian calmly replies, Yes, and I want to buy toilet paper.
Australia). He finds cat food at special prices. He picks a dozen cans
of cat food and goes to check out.
The Manager gets suspicious. He thinks that this guy cannot have a cat
and will probably feed cat food to his kids. He asks the Indian to show
him his cat before he could let him have cat food. The Indian goes home
and returns with a cat and gets to buy the cat food.
Next week the Indian finds dog food at special prices. He picks a dozen
cans of dog food and goes to check out. The Manager again gets
suspicious. He thinks that this guy has a cat but he cannot have a dog
and he will probably feed dog-food to his kids. He asks the Indian to
bring and show him the dog before he can let him have dog food.
The Sardar goes home and returns with a dog. He gets to buy the dog
food.
Next week the Indian comes to Woolworths with a bag. He asks the manager
to put his hand in the bag.
The Manager puts his hand in the bag, feels some thing slimy and
immediately takes it out. He shouts at the Indian, What the F*** is
this? Is this shit you idiot?
The Indian calmly replies, Yes, and I want to buy toilet paper.
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